This week is a very exciting one for me and my family. My husband Parker and I are not only celebrating our 2-year wedding anniversary on Monday the 18th, but we are also attending his White Coat Ceremony and he starts his orientation at Rocky Vista University Southern Utah.
That's right Parker is becoming a student doctor and starting his journey through medical school.
The road to the journey of medical school at RVU-SU
Parker has been working tirelessly for as long as he can remember to achieve his goal of becoming a doctor. The road hasn't been easy for either of us, but we are so excited for him to finally be starting.
Being the spouse of a pre-med or medical student is not always the easiest. It has had its ups and downs, but I have learned four key things along the way.
Prioritize time together amidst studying and extra curriculars
During his undergraduate experience as a premed student Parker had to do many things to help increase his chances of getting into medical school. On top of getting good grads on his often difficult and time-consuming classes, like O. Chem. and Anatomy he also needed to participate in many extracurricular activities.
These activities included things like leadership experiences and service. He was busy pretty frequently, but once we started dating, we decided to prioritize time together by being together for these things.
While it might not sound very fun to everyone, we spent most of our dates doing homework and studying together, and we later ran a creative writing club together. We would go places to do assignments together like a museum for his history class or rivers to find bugs he could study.
We made the most of the hard times and always prioritized our time together. We found positivity and 'made honey' when things were looking rough.
The summer we were engaged and got married Parker was studying for the MCAT and so I would read, write, or play a game while he would study. Sometimes I even watched his practice material videos with him.
Life gets busy for all of us, and it is important to let your partner know you are supporting them in their goals. For us, the easiest way to prioritize our time together was to spend time doing the boring and necessary things together.
Have the hard conversations
Pretty early on in our relationship Parker and I had to have the hard conversations. We talked about finances, family, moving, and many other things in the very early stages of dating and still check in with them regularly.
Medical school is incredibly competitive and keeps a person very busy. Really early on Parker wanted me to know that there was a chance he might have to move across the country for school, would be really busy if he got in, and that there was even a chance he wouldn't get in and would have to do something different.
Once we were married and Parker was applying, we had to discuss schools to apply, where we would want to be living for the next few years. Finances became a huge thing during this point as well since applications are very pricey and most students are lucky to only get one acceptance from the 20+ schools they apply to.
We have had to live well below our means so that we could afford those applications. Then once he got in, we had to have conversations about the massive amounts of loans we would need to take out.
I had to ensure I could find work in or near where he was going to school since I was going to be the only one who could be working for the next few years.
We also talked about family. While we know we probably want to have kids of our own one day, we also have to plan them for times when Parker can be more present and so we have already had to start creating a tentative timeline for that.
For a feminist like me, making sure we could both prioritize our family and careers was really important for me.
Cheering each other on
Parker and I pride ourselves on our ability to be each other's biggest advocate and cheerleader.
I have been by his side for every acceptance, and denial of schools. We together celebrated when we chose a school. When Parker has had anxieties about school and the long-term, I have been there to encourage him.
Parker has done the same for me. He delayed attending and applying to schools for a year so that I could finish my bachelor's degree. When I have been unmotivated to do homework, he has always cheered me on and helped me start it.
Enjoy the journey together
Going through the stresses of taking a big step, like going to medical school, haven't always been easy. We have definitely had harder times and needed to have serious conversations.
I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with me on this journey though. Parker has taught me how to find joy in the struggles, and we have both learned to be patient, go with the flow, embrace optimism, and enjoy the journey.
Комментарии